Yikes I'm the Michelin Man....

Well as I was settling into what was occurring and that which I had no power over....We were faced with the diagnosis of Invasive Pulmonary Aspergilliosis. This was a hard pill to swallow, and as I looked into the eyes of Dr. Hirota I knew how serious this news was. My sweet doctor promised that day that he would see this through until the end. He told us not to look all over the web to find out about this fungus, but to go to the CDC site which would cut out all the super scary stuff. I had no access to a computer, nor did I really want to know any more than the fact that I had something in my lungs which wanted to destroy me.... It is a strange place to be in when you have no ability of your own to fight the fight of your life....and really need to fall upon your faith. In truth, it was not long ago at all that 95% of those who contracted this vicious fungus died!

I am incredibly blessed because the word of God has been so planted in me that I could call up Scripture after Scripture to confront each situation as it presented itself....though I couldn't "feel" God....I felt so alone and to be honest I had my weak moments where it was impossible to hold back the tears. But, no matter! I knew that God had a plan and I only needed to trust that He loved me enough to see me through. Did I worry about dying? Yes and NO...Of course, I'm human and my emotions fought against this thing that was happening to me that was unfair; one day I was sitting there not bothering anyone and the next I was fighting for my life. You know, with all the thoughts and conversations that I've had between me and the Lord...I have yet to ask why? I know that I know that I know, that He IS in control. But I was sure that heaven would be my home and was not afraid of death itself. I don't say this lightly because the cost of my sin's being washed away was that of Jesus and what He achieved on the cross and in His shed blood.

And so....all of a sudden I noticed that my eye was becoming swollen and closing. I pointed it out to Mike and the nurses...And no one seemed to be alarmed in any way. Then my chest began to puff up and when I touched it I would sense a crackling sensation. Before long my face puffed up and my chest arms and hands. It was so painful and all of a sudden in the middle of the night, these weird looking people with masks and different uniforms than my regular nurses came and told me they were taking me to ICU and they gathered all of my things in bags and rolled me up to the 7th floor. I was pretty panicked as it was like a scene from some sci-fi movie.

Not long after they got me in the bed, they just left me and didn't tell me anything.....Now, I was already suffering from sleep deprivation and was in so much pain that I began to beg for morphine. When a male nurse finally arrived to "check me in," he didn't seem to know anything about my condition, and that I was supposed to be in isolation. I kind of lost it at this point and raised my voice and told him, how would you feel if you were taken in the middle of the night and no one told you what was going on? He gave me some light reassurance and I made sure that my breathing treatments would continue non-interrupted and that I would be given pain medication whenever I needed it.

I laid there for hours and hours looking out on the floor where it seemed that I was in a fishbowl and everyone else was outside watching at a distance. It was lonely, confusing, frightening and frustrating. I began to hallucinate and would find myself having a full on conversation with someone and then open my eyes to see that no one was there. How embarrassing...as this happened over and over. At this point my catheter had been taken out but they found it would be better to replace it. I had the feeling of having to go potty all the time but didn't know what to do about that...I just waited.

The doctor's determined that I had gotten subcutaneous emphysema because of the early removal of the chest tube. This meant that my blessed surgeon who had painfully removed the tube in the first place would have to re-insert a new drainage tube! Can I say PAIN with a Capitol P? So, it came time and the surgeon arrived and two nursing students attended. One was a female who held my hand as the procedure began. It was terrible! The pain almost too much to bear, and yet I spoke of the sweetness of the Lord the entire time. He hid me in His High Tower!

More to follow....

The Fifth Floor

Had I realized beforehand the harrowing experiences that I would face starting on the 5th floor at LBM, I would have run away with my tail between my legs. Hey, I'm no super hero!!!! The truth is....I am weak and HE IS STRONG!

During this time, cultures had been grown and it was finally determined that I had the Acinetobacter baumannii pneumonia. We were told that it was a rare type of infection brought back by the military returning from Iraq. Oh, so that explains it!!!! Yeah, when I was last in Iraq covering the news for Fox News....Oh, that's right I had never been in the middle east and furthermore hadn't left the US for several years. So, where'd I pick this up? Hmmm, the hospital turned out to be the first and only culprit! You remember that simple outpatient surgery that I had just a few weeks earlier? You know, the one that seemed like everything had just gone better than I ever expected????

But before I tell you about my stay at Long Beach Memorial, my blonde brain has remembered a bit of info that I had forgotten....Believe me, it pains me to remember! But it is part of the journey between my first and second stay at LBM. You see, after I was initially treated for the AB Pneumonia, my care continued as I was released from the hospital and it was arranged for me to receive treatment at a nearby "nice little nursing center." Yeah right! Don't believe the pamphlets or the case manager's who wear high heal shoes with no stockings, a white lab coat and smile at you a lot!

Mike and I were told about Broadway By the Sea, a nursing center near the ocean in Long Beach not too far from LBM. The brochure looked so nice and even as the ambulance driver's towed my gurney through the halls, I thought "oh, this looks like a nice little place." At least it didn't smell like urine. However, I was more than surprised when I had been promised an isolation room with no one else residing in it; and found that I would have a room mate who cried out through the night in her state of dementia for the entire time I was there. The beds looked like cots and they were not even prepared with the oxygen that I would need to get me through the night. At that time I believe I was still on 5-ltrs. And Mike was forced to go home because of the visiting hour rules.

They actually ran out of oxygen, as the night wore on and I saw each of those who were supposed to be caring for me, fumble with the equipment and speaking to one another in their native tongue (Tugalic). Their faces shown how they thought I was some kind of high and mighty queen demanding her way....when in reality I was fighting for my life and they were completely devoid of any understanding. My stay at this house of horror's lasted a few weeks, and the only saving grace was the Physical Therapy folks who helped me to re-build some of the endurance and strength that I had lost since becoming ill. When I was discharged from Broadway By the Sea, I was so glad to go home...but ended up back in LBM ER and being admitted once again.

Anyway, my stay on the fifth floor began with breathing treatments, lots of intravenous medications and a consistent frustration in trying to communicate to those around me when my voice was completely gone. After meeting Doctor Hirota as well as other doctor's in charge of my care, I found that they were stumped as to why my condition wasn't improving. I was on 10-ltrs. of oxygen and found it nearly impossible to sleep. I can truthfully say that I "cat napped" for more than 2 months, which caused its own set of issues.

Over the following days, I was told that a bronchoscopy would need to be done in order for the the doctor's to have a better idea of what was going on. This is something that made me really nervous, knowing that they would be sending a scope down my throat into my lungs to take a look. However, when I arrived for the procedure I found a lady who knew one of my dearest friends at work and it seemed to take much of the shakiness away. The medication to relax me didn't hurt either :) I awoke not remembering anything. But Doctor Hirota still suspected something more that was going on. At that time, he had added a very powerful antibiotic to the many bags that were a part of my "beeping tree."

Voriconazole, along with the other meds that I was being pumped up with began to cause some very strange issues with my site. I became sensitive to light...but more than that, when I looked upon a light or white background I would see black bug like creatures with lots of legs all lined up perfectly crawling up wherever I looked. When I looked upon a dark or black background, I saw white bug like creatures exactly as the others. I also began to see apparitions in the sky during the day, and therefore it made it difficult to even look out the window. I also couldn't see the television and it was impossible for me to read. And so, I spent hour after hour with me....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voriconazole

This is when things got kind of fun....when the nurses and doctor's all began wearing yellow gowns, gloves and masks when they entered my room....even the janitor's, the folks who gave me breathing treatments, and all visitor's. Poor Mike came every day to sit with me and was forced to wear the gown and mask, but most times escaped having to wear the gloves. The issue was that the hospital didn't want anyone carrying anything I coughed up back into the real world.

One night around midnight, the nurses came in an said they were moving me to another room. Mind you, I had been in this room at that time for several weeks and though it wasn't home....the surroundings had become familiar. When they moved me there was a big fight between the nurses that brought me down to the end of the hall by the staircase and those who were there already. I guess they had determined to put "isolation" patients in the rooms nearest to the staircases. There was a sign posted that no one was to enter without first seeing a nurse.

Little did I know that the adventure had really just begun! Doctor Hirota informed Mike and I of what he suspected that I had as the pneumonia was actually beginning to go away. He said the word Aspergillus. With gravity, he explained a bit about this fungus and how he suspected that it was in my lungs, but the only way to make that diagnosis would be to have a lung biopsy performed. Can I tell you how excited I was to hear this???? But, at the same time....God gave me such peace...and our God sent doctor was so precious in his genuine care and concern for me as a human being.

As I was wheeled down to the operating wing and lingered in the hall speaking with everyone that I needed to and signing papers, I was introduced to the surgeon and the anesthesiologist as we all discussed how to proceed due to my issue of PVC's (arrhythmia's) and the fact that one lung would need to be shut down to perform the biopsy and they would need to rely on the other. Well, the doctor's thought there was a good chance that they could get in and out really quick and get a specimen of lung tissue without too much of a problem and the anesthesiologist gave me his word that he would keep watch on everything to keep me safe.

When I awoke, I was told that the procedure had been done and that a chest tube had been inserted to drain off the blood and air from the lung that had been collapsed during the procedure. Can I tell you that morphine had finally become a friend.... and though I slept only briefly 24/7, I wasn't in too much pain...although a catheter had been put in place and I was pretty much confined to the bed for several days. The surgeon looked in on me and thought I was ready to have the chest tube removed.....And this is where the fun really began (to be continued)

WHERE ON EARTH HAVE I BEEN?????

When I initially began this blog, it was my intention to write about relative and challenging issues which many of us have in common, perhaps asking questions that may be somewhat uncomfortable to ask...but need to be put forth, just the same. However, shortly after I began to post....something happened....and I'd like to relay my journey in parts. Why? Normally a bloggers favorite subject is themselves; this is where I differ from my compatriots :) I would much rather discuss anything but me in an open forum and instead answer the challenge which Jesus gave us in Mark 16:15 and be salt amongst the sometimes watered down "gospel" messages brought forth from so many of today's pulpits.

However, let's get caught up with my journey up until this point because it is now an integral part of who I am today....

And so, I found myself preparing for relatively simple out patient procedure to remove my diseased gall bladder. Up until June of 2009, I remained fixed on getting rid of the issue that had caused me so much pain and illness since being hospitalized over Christmas. On June 2oth I checked into the Outpatient Surgery Center at Long Beach Memorial Hospital, a bit nervous since I am an asthmatic and one never knows how being "put under" will affect my breathing. I was also going to endure a DNC at the same time due to some female issues which had been affecting me for many months.

Well, it seemed in no time at all....I was in recovery and being told that the surgeon was able to do the arthroscopic surgery, instead of cutting me open. I was so relieved about this because I knew that my recovery time would be a lot quicker and I could return to my job (which I love almost as much as riding my motorcycle :) and that life would go on as usual.

Several days following the surgery, I began to have some additional breathing problems which I sought help for both in the Acute Care Clinic and the ER on several occasions. I had an appointment scheduled with my primary care physician, and was determined to hold out until I saw him because I trusted his advice. The day of that appointment, I found myself huddled in my office under two sweaters with chill's and a fever. Though it wasn't the smartest thing to have waited...even a few days; what my PCP did was even more stupid.

I saw Doctor Roth on a day when the electric ended up going out in the building because there was a traffic accident nearby that brought down a pole. And so, I was told to go to another location to have an X-Ray done of my lungs to rule out pneumonia. After I received the X-Ray in hand, my husband ran it up to Dr. Roth and was told "oh, she has some bugger's in her lungs; have her take this medication" and they sent me on my merry way.

Later that day, my breathing became worse and we decided to go to a different ER (Los Alamitos Medical Center) where the doc took one look at my X-Ray and said that I had pneumonia. I was given another prescription and sent home. When I didn't get any better over the following days, we returned to our Acute Care Clinic where we saw a doctor who really took the time to think about there being something more going on than just a simple pneumonia. I was shot up with more antibiotic's, steroids, and given more prescriptions and told to return the next day. When I did, the doc said I needed to be in the hospital and was taken by ambulance to LBM where I spent many many hours on a gurney before they decided to put me up on the 5th floor.

My stay there was the beginning of what would turn out to be many days hospitalized; non of which were uneventful! At this point I might add that I had no voice left from all the coughing and so my communication was mostly through whispering or writing notes.

Before I end this first addition of my journey, I would like to introduce you to Dr. David Hirota. He's my infectious disease doctor. He is my blessing sent by God, who up until now has worked very hard (and prayed I might add) to keep me alive. Though I was under the care of what has become a great team of doctor's, David is who we believe to be Gods man in all of this.... And this is only the tip of the ice-berg in what has evolved into "Judy's Journey." You can see pic's on my FB page under Judy Massey Notchick if you'd like and I will soon add another installation of my journey continued....